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List of My Family episodes - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

List of My Family episodesFrom Wikipedia, the free encyclopediaJump to: navigation,searchThe following is a list of episodes for the British sitcom My Family, that has aired on BBC One since 19 September 2000.[1] As of 9 July 2010, 102 episodes have aired.[2] A nine-part eleventh series and a 2010 Christmas special are in production.Contents1 Overview1.1 Series One (2000)1.2 Series Two (2001)1.3 Series Three (2002)1.4 Christmas Special (2002)1.5 Series Four (2003)1.6 Christmas Special (2003)1.7 Series Five (2004)1.8 Specials (2004-2005)1.9 Series Six (2006)1.10 Christmas Special (2006)1.11 Series Seven (2007)1.12 Christmas Special (2007)1.13 Series Eight (2008)1.14 Christmas Special (2008)1.15 Series Nine (2009)1.16 Christmas Special (2009)1.17 Series Ten (2010)2 References3 External links[edit] OverviewThe first series of eight episodes aired from 19 September to 7 November 2000, mostly on Tuesdays at 8:30 pm.[1] The second series, of thirteen episodes, aired from 31 August to 30 November 2001 on Fridays at 8:30 pm and the third series, of twelve episodes, from 6 September to 12 December 2002, firstly on Fridays at 8:30 pm then Thursday at 8:00 pm.[1] The 2002 Christmas special aired at 6:55 pm.[1] The thirteen-episode fourth series aired from 21 March to 13 June 2003 on Fridays, mostly at 8:30 pm.[1] A Christmas special aired on 5 December 2003 and a further special aired on 12 March 2004.[3] The fifth series, of thirteen episodes, aired from 19 March to 18 June 2004.[3] The 2004 Christmas special aired on 25 December 2004 and the 2005 special on 24 December 2005.[3] The seven-episode sixth series aired from 10 March to 28 April 2006, followed by a Christmas special on 25 December 2006.[3] Series Seven, of nine episodes, aired from 6 April to 8 June 2007.[4] A Christmas special aired on 26 December 2007 at 7:00 pm. In addition, a short episode for Comic Relief aired on 11 March 2005. The eighth series aired from 11 April to 23 May 2008 on Friday evenings at 9:00 pm, moving to 9:30 pm from the second episode onwards. The 2008 Christmas special aired on 24 December at 8:30 pm.[5][6]. The ninth series, of nine episodes aired from 2 April to 14 May 2009 on Thursday evenings at 8:30pm, moving to 8:00pm from the second episode onwards (Episodes 4 and 5 were broadcast on Sunday 19 May at 8pm and 8:30pm respectively).[7] A Christmas special aired on 24 December 2009 at 8pm.All episodes are thirty minutes long, except six Christmas specials.[1] The 2004, 2005 and 2006 Christmas specials are 50 minutes long whilst the 2007, 2008 and 2009 specials are 60 minutes long.[8] All episodes originally aired on BBC One.SeriesEpisodesOriginally airedDVD releaseChristmas SpecialsRegion 1Region 2One8200010 October 200622 March 2004N/ATwo13200110 October 20067 June 2004N/AThree14200213 October 200912 September 2005"Ding Dong Merrily"Four14200313 October 200920 March 2006"Sixty Feet Under"Five162004�2005―18 September 2006"Glad Tidings We Bring" & "...And I’ll Cry If I Want To"Six82006―25 June 2007"The Heart of Christmas"Seven102007―24 September 2007"Ho Ho No"Eight82008―14 July 2008"Have An Unhappy Christmas"Nine102009―25 May 2009"2039: A Christmas Oddity"Ten92010―4 October 2010Eleven72011―TBA[edit] Series One (2000)Main article: My Family (series 1)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership1"The Serpent’s Tooth"Baz TaylorJames Hendrie and Ian Brown19 September 2000 (2000-09-19)30 minutes8.48 millionBen (Robert Lindsay) gets angry when Janey (Daniela Denby-Ashe) tells him she is seeing another dentist, the Australian Mel Fraser, as Ben never gets round to seeing them. Ben soon discovers that Susan (Zo? Wanamaker) has also seen Mel, causing them to argue. They then have to reassure Michael (Gabriel Thompson) that they are not going to divorce. Meanwhile Janey, who had taken an instant liking to Mel, says she will not see him again after he treated her like a child. Nick (Kris Marshall),nike mercurial, meanwhile, meets Isabelle (Karine Adrover), a French swimwear model, on the Internet. Ben bets him ￡50 she is not who she says she is,mercurial nike, and so Nick invites her round. Michael rebels by buying himself a rabbit called Hannibal. 2"Pain In The Class"Baz TaylorJames Hendrie and Ian Brown26 September 2000 (2000-09-26)30 minutes7.46 millionMichael gets bullied at school by Jason Hodder, and when Ben and Susan find out, Michael calls Susan a "control freak", which means Ben is forced to try and deal with it. However, when it gets worse, she invites Hodder's parents (Brian Pettifer and Janine Duvitski) around to discuss the problem. Meanwhile, Nick tries to become a dotcom millionaire and Janey wants a tattoo. 3"Droit De Seigneur Ben"Baz TaylorFred Barron and Shawn Schepps3 October 2000 (2000-10-03)30 minutes5.95 millionBrigitte (Daisy Donovan) and Lord Whitten (Peter Blythe), a patient, arrange a date between Janey and Whitten's son Toby. However, Toby tries to assault her and Whitten's son (Orlando Wells) then goes to the sugery for treatment. Also, Susan gets tickets for Don Giovanni, but Ben is reluctant to go, and Nick becomes an artist. 4"The Last Resort"Baz TaylorSteve Armogida, Jim Armogida, Ian Brown and James Hendrie10 October 2000 (2000-10-10)30 minutes5.42 millionSusan turns 40 again, and after persuasion from Janey, Ben takes her for a romantic weekend at a hotel they stayed in April 1978, shortly before they were married. The couple in the next room, the Pickerings (Rowena Cooper and John Arthur), get friendly but turn out to be swingers. Meanwhile, at home Nick and Janey go out leaving Michael on his own. 5"Farewell To Alarms"Baz TaylorSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida17 October 2000 (2000-10-17)30 minutes6.89 millionAfter Brigitte thinks her van has been stolen from near the Harpers' house, Susan insists they get an expensive top-of-the-range burglar alarm, which soon lands them in trouble with the police when it goes off too often. Also, Nick becomes a landlord and then a stripper. 6"Death And Ben Take A Policy"Baz TaylorFred Barron and Penny Croft24 October 2000 (2000-10-24)30 minutes6.19 millionWhen a Chinese businessman who was on a tour with Susan's company is found dead at Madame Tussauds, Susan is worried as it's the children's "first death". Meanwhile, Nick brings round his new girlfriend Emily (Amy Phillips), who tries to sell Ben life insurance, and Janey wants a water bra. 7"The Awkward Phrase"Baz TaylorFred Barron30 October 2000 (2000-10-30)30 minutes8.38 millionMichael has his first date with a girl from school (Rosie Wiggins) and gets tips from Nick, Ben and Janey. Meanwhile, Nick tries to get a job by growing a moustache, and Janey buys a pair of ￡98 Prada jeans, which Susan had forbidden her to purchase. 8"Much Ado About Ben"Baz TaylorSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida7 November 2000 (2000-11-07)30 minutes7.62 millionSusan finds Viagra in Nick's trousers, which she then confiscates,nike jordan, but when Ben then uses it he is rushed to hospital. After being diagnosed with high cholesterol, he is put on a diet by Susan. Also, Janey is trying to get tickets for a Marilyn Manson concert, and when Susan takes up yoga to help her stop smoking Ben takes part in a lesson at their house. [edit] Series Two (2001)Main article: My Family (series 2)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership9"All Roads Lead To Ramon"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown31 August 2001 (2001-08-31)30 minutes8.94 millionWhen Nick is fired from an employment agency for being "chronically unemployable", Susan is forced into giving him a job as a tour guide, which proves a disaster. Meanwhile, when Janey has a different boy round each day, each one coaching in her A-Levels, Ben accidentally calls her a prostitute. Also, Stupid Brian (Kevin Bishop) tries to win Janey back, and Ben has dental assistant problems. The agency sends him a temporary assistant, Ramon, who turns out to be Nick in disguise. 10"The Unkindest Cut"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida7 September 2001 (2001-09-07)30 minutes9.04 millionAfter a weekend together in Paris, Susan thinks she is pregnant. After discussing whether to have the baby or not, Susan finds out it was a false alarm, but insists Ben has a vasectomy so it does not happen again. Meanwhile, Nick follows Jamie Oliver and becomes a "naked chef". 11"Parisian Beauty"Dewi HumphreysAndrea Solomons14 September 2001 (2001-09-14)30 minutes8.24 millionJaney has invited over Sylvie (Beatriz Batarda), a French exchange student, so she can go to Paris in return. This means Michael has to stay in Nick's room, and Ben thinks that Sylvie fancies him. Also, Nick is taking part in a sleep deprivation experiment. 12"Trust Never Sleeps"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown21 September 2001 (2001-09-21)30 minutes9.55 millionSusan reads in Janey's diary that she thinks Susan does not trust her. So, after getting an 'A' in a French project, Susan shows she trusts Janey by letting her have a party while she and Ben are in Oxford for the night. However, when Ben and Susan return after getting second thoughts, they are stuck in their bedroom hiding from Janey and her friends. However, Ben soon needs the toilet. 13"Death and Ben Take A Holiday"Dewi HumphreysFred Barron28 September 2001 (2001-09-28)30 minutes9.65 millionWhen Ben's 93-year-old aunt Margaret dies, Susan cannot go to Leeds with him for the funeral because she has flu, so he is forced to go with Nick. They are forced to share a bed at a rundown Bed and Breakfast, while Nick tries to spend the night with the hotel maid Rita (Abby Ford). After taking some pills she got from Stupid Brian, Susan arrives in Leeds and discovers Aunt Margaret wearing a bracelet that Ben gave her. 14"Driving Miss Crazy"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown5 October 2001 (2001-10-05)30 minutes11.00 millionJaney is revising for her driving test, while Ben is having problems with his neighbour Mr. Casey (Nickolas Grace) and his dog Gemma, who always fouls on the Harper's porch. Mr. Casey complains non-stop about Ben's scruffy shed, untidy garden and other things. Both Ben and Mr. Casey refuse to back down, and a huge war ensues. 15"I Second That Emulsion"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown12 October 2001 (2001-10-12)30 minutes11.16 millionSusan decides to redecorate the living room, and Stupid Brian offers to do the job, but Susan has problems deciding what colour to paint it. Meanwhile, Stupid Brian spends the night in Janey's room causing a dilemma for Ben and Susan, and Nick becomes a piano tuner and then gets a job in a paint shop, where he serves Ben. 16"The Age of Romance"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown19 October 2001 (2001-10-19)30 minutes11.22 millionNick gets a girlfriend called Amanda (Jan Francis), who is old enough to be his mother, and when Susan invites her round to dinner she finds out Amanda is married. Also, after Michael gets a new computer and Nick has his dinner with Amanda, Janey starts to feel like the "poor relation". 17"Get Cartier"Dewi HumphreysFred Barron26 October 2001 (2001-10-26)30 minutes11.05 millionWhen Ben gets a new patient called Mr. Smith (Michael Attwell), he suspects that he is an "underworld kingpin", although Mr. Smith says his business is "organised dance and waste removal". However, Ben soon starts to get suspicious when he receives lots of gifts, and when Susan finds one of them, a Cartier watch, she thinks Ben has bought it for their upcoming 23rd wedding anniversary. 18"’Tis A Pity She’s A Whore"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida2 November 2001 (2001-11-02)30 minutes11.06 millionWhen Susan's mother (Avril Elgar) rings and says she's dying again, Janey goes to visit her. She then tells Janey that her mother Mary was a prostitute, which shocks Ben as Susan never told him. Meanwhile, Michael is standing in the school elections as a Conservative, much to Ben's annoyance as he claims it is a "Labour household", but Michael does manage to get Ben a park bench with his name on it. 19"The Last Supper"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida9 November 2001 (2001-11-09)30 minutes12.54 millionScott Tailor (Mac McDonald), Susan's new American boss, comes round for dinner. After arguing with him about his new ideas, which includes her dressing up as a Beatle, she trigers his acid reflux so he has to sleep in their bed overnight. When he then dies in his sleep, Susan thinks she argued him to death and goes to a priest (Andy Greenhalgh) to confess. Meanwhile, Nick dates a policewoman (Kaye Wragg). 20"Ben Wants To Be A Millionaire"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida23 November 2001 (2001-11-23)30 minutes11.22 millionBen and Susan go out to dinner with a multi-millionaire old school friend of his, Andy Banks (Daniel Hill), and his young wife Ambyr (Kim Ross), who is going in for cosmetic surgery. After taking advice from Andy, both Ben and Susan invest in the stock market. Meanwhile, Susan is learning Russian for a new tour group, Janey wants some Prada shoes and Nick tries out two new jobs: selling his organs on eBay, and being a sperm donor. 21"Breakable"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown30 November 2001 (2001-11-30)30 minutes11.15 millionSusan finds ￡1255 in Nick's trousers, and Nick uses this to buy a motorcycle so he can form a motorcycle stunt display team called The League of Mentalmen. His first performance is at the Peterborough Rock Festival, where he gets injured when he launches himself off a ramp and hits a cow and ends up in hospital with a broken arm, leg, three broken ribs and whiplash. Susan visits Nick and persuades Ben to act fatherly to his son, making him converse with Nick and give him his beloved childhood toy, Sir Edworth Tedworth. She also tries to make Ben confess to Nick that he loves him. Meanwhile, Janey gets a job as a waitress in Soho and hopes to be discovered by film producers, but ends up being fired. [edit] Series Three (2002)Main article: My Family (series 3)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership22"Absent Vixen, Cheeky Monkey"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown6 September 2002 (2002-09-06)30 minutes8.56 millionAfter Janey leaves home to go to Manchester University, Ben and Susan fight for who will get her room, Susan begins to miss Janey too much and begins to bug Ben about it every night. Meanwhile, Nick gets a job as a shelf stacker at a supermarket called Freshfair and brings his work home with him, while Michael is reading The Art of War by Sun Tzu. 23"Shrink Rap"Dewi HumphreysFred Barron and Sophie Hetherington13 September 2002 (2002-09-13)30 minutes8.28 millionSusan 'finds' a letter in Michael's room from the school about an 'Auction of Promises', which he had hidden because he finds his parents embarrassing. However, Ben and Susan go to the Auction anyway, with Susan donating a tour and Ben donating a dental session. Susan bids for everything, including a counselling session, which she and Ben then attend. 24"Desperately Squeaking Susan"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown20 September 2002 (2002-09-20)30 minutes8.23 millionFollowing Janey's absence, Susan feels a void and needs female company, so she invites the daughter of Ben's cousin, Abi (Siobhan Hayes), who has just started at Art College in London, round for dinner. However, they end up in Casualty when Abi puts her hand through a window. Susan then invites Abi to come and live with them, much to Ben's annoyance. Meanwhile, Nick becomes a magician under the name Brian Miles while Susan plays the cello. 25"Of Mice And Ben"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida27 September 2002 (2002-09-27)30 minutes8.12 millionBen and Susan agree that Abi can make a film of them for her film class, to portray a "typical married couple". Meanwhile, there is a rat which seems to survive every trap set for it. It is eventually found to be nestled in the basement where it comes face to face with Ben, whose terrified reaction is caught on camera by Abi who then sells it to a TV programme called When Animals Attack. 26"Imperfect Strangers"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown3 October 2002 (2002-10-03)30 minutes7.34 millionAfter getting a call of distress from Janey, Ben and Susan drive up to Manchester where they discover they are not needed after all, so they decide to stay in Maythorne Metrolodge on the M62. Once there they decide to pretend to be strangers under the names Delores DeLarge and Johnny Studd, and meet for the first time. Meanwhile, Abi invites her boyfriend Michael (Matthew Ashforde) round, and the other Michael tells lies to make sure he leaves, leaving Abi furious. 27"The Second Greatest Story Ever Told"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida10 October 2002 (2002-10-10)30 minutes8.14 millionSusan auditions for the community theatre's nativity play, but ends up with the role of shepherd number two, while Nick is given the part of Jesus, but she soon tries to expand her character. Abi has a new job at a coffee shop, where Michael finds out his date Sophie (Sydney Stevenson) is seeing someone else. Meanwhile, Ben is writing a speech for the Central London Dental Association, and very reluctantly has to go to the dentist. He arrives to find his dentist, old mentor Roger Bailey, has died and been replaced by his son Roger Bailey, Jr (Keiron Self), who treats him like a toddler. 28"Waiting to Inhale"Dewi HumphreysFred Barron17 October 2002 (2002-10-17)30 minutes6.16 millionAfter finding a cannabis cigarette in Michael's bedroom, which he had got from a friend called Bex (Gemma Gregory), Susan and Ben decide to smoke it themselves as an example to their children. However, after their high Ben and Susan realise they have to make up another cigarette using expired parsley, so they can have a word with Michael. 29"Misery"Dewi HumphreysAndrea Solomons24 October 2002 (2002-10-24)30 minutes8.57 millionSusan goes to stay with Janey at University and is determined to relive her own student days. Meanwhile, Ben has hurt his ankle but still insists on playing golf with his 90-year-old friend Gerald Dearden (Hugh Lloyd), and Nick becomes a female impersonator. 30"Auto Erotica"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida7 November 2002 (2002-11-07)30 minutes7.94 millionSusan wants a romantic weekend in Dorset for her and Ben's 26th wedding anniversary. However, after Nick wins an 72 MG Roadster car in a poker game, Ben is more concerned about fixing it up. Also, Michael accidentally ends up with a pair of knickers which belong to Abi, who he fancies. 31"A Handful of Dust"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown21 November 2002 (2002-11-21)30 minutes7.82 millionBen is upset when everyone ignores his birthday, although he told them not to make a fuss. After much pestering from Susan, Janey comes down from university for Ben's birthday, and brings with her a friend called Kate (Catherine Bailey), and the two seem to be lesbians. Nick becomes a gorilla-gram. 32"The Lost Weekend"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown28 November 2002 (2002-11-28)30 minutes7.23 millionAfter Michael leaves for a Higher Maths Fun Weekend, Ben and Susan have the house to themselves. Susan's perfect weekend includes looking for antiques and going to the Tate Modern, while Ben's is to relax and do nothing at home or to go to the cinema. Ben tries to teach Susan to relax, but in the end they just end up annoying each other. 33"Ghosts"Dewi HumphreysAndrea Solomons5 December 2002 (2002-12-05)30 minutes7.68 millionAfter signing up on oldpals.com, Susan gets a bunch of flowers from Kirk Mason (Michael Simkins), who dumped her 28 years previously, and with Janey's help she gets her revenge on him. Meanwhile, Michael finds out their house is cursed and Abi becomes convinced the house is haunted. While Nick becomes an exorcist and a taxi driver. 34"One Flew Out of the Cuckoo’s Nest"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida12 December 2002 (2002-12-12)30 minutes7.24 millionBen finally gets so fed up with Nick after he breaks and sells his record collection that he tells Nick to move out. Nick eventually moves out, much to Susan's horror. He gets a job at Ben's local pub, but he is still not totally independent. Also, Michael tries to get fit for a girl called Julia (Katie Hudson). [edit] Christmas Special (2002)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership35"Ding Dong Merrily"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown25 December 2002 (2002-12-25)30 minutes8.57 millionWhen Janey comes home for Christmas, she's pregnant and Susan wants to know who the father is. However, Janey refuses to tell her, but does tell Ben, who then lies to Susan about the father. Meanwhile, Nick starts a Christmas tree business and then invites round Mr Bradley (Trevor Peacock), an "old person", for Christmas Day. Also, when Susan cooks the turkey with chocolate and raisins, everyone decides they are vegetarians. [edit] Series Four (2003)Main article: My Family (series 4)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership36"Fitting Punishment"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown21 March 2003 (2003-03-21)30 minutes8.77 millionFollowing the death of Mr Beamish, who owned the surgery above Ben's, Roger Bailey Jnr, the son of Ben's former mentor, tries to buy it, but Ben lies and tells him someone else has bought it, so Roger buys the surgery below instead. Meanwhile, Susan tries to make the house baby-friendly for Janey's yet-to-be-born baby, and then has problems with the plumbers. Nick becomes a film extra, Michael becomes obsessed with the Army cadets and Roger falls for Abi as soon as he sees her. 37"They Shoot Harpers, Don’t They?"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown28 March 2003 (2003-03-28)30 minutes9.76 millionSusan tricks Ben into joining a modern Latin dance class, but Ben dances better than her. They both then get Roger, who dances "like Fred Astaire", to teach them privately so they can enter a competition at the end of the month. Meanwhile, after getting a 'B' in a Maths test, Michael decides to stop thinking about girls so he can focus on his studies. Guest starring Jacey Sallés and Georgie Glen. 38"The Great Escape"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida4 April 2003 (2003-04-04)30 minutes10.17 millionWhen Susan's mother Grace (Rosemary Leach) invites herself round for dinner, Ben invents an excuse and goes to Nick's apartment for the evening. When he returns, he does not realise Grace is in his bed and nearly makes love to her thinking that she is Susan. The following day, they all end up at Nick's to avoid Grace. Also, Susan finds a condom in Michael's wallet. 39"Return of the Prodigal Prat"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida11 April 2003 (2003-04-11)30 minutes9.56 millionAfter Ben is listed in the obituaries of newspaper The Herald, he takes it as the perfect excuse to do nothing, while neighbour Mr Gleason (Paul Hunter) sets his sights on 'widowed' Susan and Michael has to write a eulogy. Meanwhile, Susan wants to make Nick's old bedroom into a nursery for Janey's yet-to-be-born baby, but Nick has plans to move back in. 40"Owed to Susan"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida18 April 2003 (2003-04-18)30 minutes8.57 millionThanks to Roger, Susan finds out that a poem that Ben wrote her while they were courting was actually Your Face by Jalal ad-Din Rumi. Susan then refuses to make love to him until he's written another one, and he even goes to Abi's poetry class to try and write another one. Meanwhile, Nick takes part in an experiment that makes him lose his memory. Guest starring Frances Barber. 41"Deliverance"Dewi HumphreysAndrea Solomons25 April 2003 (2003-04-25)30 minutes7.32 millionAfter Janey goes into labour while on the phone to Susan, she and Ben rush up to Manchester to be at her side. On the journey up there they recall Nick's birth, and when they get to St. Margaret's Hospital in Manchester, an unseen Janey has given birth to a baby boy, who is later named Kenzo. 42"Blind Justice"Dewi HumphreysAndrea Solomons2 May 2003 (2003-05-02)30 minutes8.31 millionSusan gets hysterical blindness after seeing Michael in bed with a girl called Fiona (Rachel Harvey), and it will not go until Michael says nothing happened. Meanwhile, Ben is on jury duty and is hassled by a busybody fellow juror called Joanna Elton-Johns (Sylvestra Le Touzel), and Nick becomes a "wrapping artist" and wraps everything up in brown paper. 43"Friday the 31st"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown9 May 2003 (2003-05-09)30 minutes8.47 millionIt's Halloween and Susan has turned the family home into a "house of horror" and dressed up as a witch, but Ben is much less enthusiastic. They are plagued by a group of children (Dani Harmer, Andrew Henry and Hannah Bridges) doing trick or treat, and strange things begin to happen. Also, Abi is dressed as a piece of cheese and Roger is a ghost (a white sheet, actually).. 44"Sitting Targets"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown16 May 2003 (2003-05-16)30 minutes9.89 millionBen and Susan baby-sit Kenzo for Janey, but Susan becomes annoyed when she discovers that she is the only who is unable to stop Kenzo from crying. Meanwhile, Michael wants Ben to read his Geography project, but when Ben can't be bothered. He agrees to do a UFO watch with Michael instead, and Nick is dating three girls at the same time. 45"Loco Parentis"Dewi HumphreysAndrea Solomons23 May 2003 (2003-05-23)30 minutes6.79 millionBen and Susan are forced to attend parenting classes by Michael's head teacher (Owen Brenman) after he plays truant from school, and Susan is told that she is too interventionist, so she tries to become laid back like Ben, but Michael actually misses the authority. Meanwhile, Roger tries to become more hard and tough so Abi will go out with him. 46"The Canary Cage"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown30 May 2003 (2003-05-30)30 minutes6.72 millionAfter Susan gets a free holiday for four, she, Ben, Nick and Michael all go to Lanzarote in Spain. However, Ben's luggage gets lost, and then all his credit cards and money are stolen and he is forced to beg to Nick for money. Ben also upsets the people in the next house (Henrieta Baines, Christopher Ryan and Cressida Whyte) by accindentally taking indecent photos with his new digital camera. Meanwhile, Michael spends most of his time out.. 47"May the Best Man Win"Dewi HumphreysGeorgia Pritchett6 June 2003 (2003-06-06)30 minutes7.28 millionAbi's father, Ben's cousin, Richard Harper (Anthony Head) is getting married for a fifth time, to 18-year-old Gina Beresford and he asks Ben to be the best man, which means Ben has to organise the stag night. The wedding makes Abi annoyed, especially as Gina Beresford was at the same school as her. Meanwhile, when Michael refuses to do the washing-up, no one else does it either. 48"It’s A Window Filled Life"Dewi HumphreysFred Barron and Sophie Hetherington13 June 2003 (2003-06-13)30 minutes6.61 millionRoger goes to the Harpers saying that one of his patients had got an infectious disease from Peru called "Ortiz River Fever", so Susan puts the whole house under quarantine. Michael stays upstairs with Fiona, while Nick tries to get in the house with a pregnant python called Pamela. Meanwhile, Ben manages to escape the house, meets a man called Clarence (Leslie Randall) and then has an epiphany where he does not exist. Guest starring Russ Abbot. [edit] Christmas Special (2003)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership49"Sixty Feet Under"Jay SandrichJames Hendrie and Ian Brown25 December 2003 (2003-12-25)30 minutes8.66 millionBen, Susan, Nick and Michael are on the tube after doing some Christmas shopping, and due to signalling problems the train cannot move. Michael gets a girlfriend called Claire (Sydney Stevenson), Nick makes money by selling bottled water and Susan starts decorating the carriage. Abi, Roger, and an Albanian man (Samuel Gough) are busking as a Romanian folk band, while Nick brings Richard Whiteley to see Ben and Susan. However, when the problem is fixed, the driver (Nigel Lindsay) refuses to move on until Susan, who was rude to him, apologises. Meanwhile, Ben, dying for a drink, tries to steal the drunk man’s booze whilst everyone in the carriage is asleep. [edit] Series Five (2004)Main article: My Family (series 5)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership50"Reloaded"Dewi HumphreysAndrea Solomons12 March 2004 (2004-03-12)30 minutes7.50 millionSusan is lying in bed, bored and depressed, with a broken leg, after Ben accidentally reversed the car into her. When Ben comes upstairs to see how she is they end up discussing their family, which depresses them both. They start arguing when Ben surprises her with a box of Turkish Delight, which he didn’t know, she hates. The topic of conversation changes numerous times as they both discuss Nick, Janey and Michael and also reminisce on the arrival of Abi and Roger’s pathetic attempts at asking her out. When Ben gets bored and decides to go downstairs he finds he can’t, as his back as gone thus he and Susan are both stuck. 51"The Mummy Returns"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown19 March 2004 (2004-03-19)30 minutes9.17 millionJaney returns home, having being thrown out of Manchester University, but tells Ben and Susan she dropped out. However, Susan soon finds out that the Police are looking for her, and then Susan lies when they turn up at the house, but it turns out the policeman (Gareth Ferdinando) turns out to be an old flame. Also, Janey moves into her own flat, to the delight of Ben. Meanwhile, Michael goes religious with a new friend called Hubert (Alex Dawson) and Abi gets involved in naturism thanks to Ben’s misguided advice and the fact that he held back information for his own amusement. Also, Ben offers some fatherly advice when it is not needed. 52"You Don’t Know Jack"Dewi HumphreysAndrea Solomons26 March 2004 (2004-03-26)30 minutes7.69 millionMichael gets a 'cool' new friend called Jack (Michael Obiora), who gives Michael street cred while he does Jack's homework to his mother’s disgust. Jack gets a crush on Susan, which Michael encourages, while Ben simply focuses on the fact that he shares an interest in football and Slade with Jack. However, Jack’s interest in Susan begins to bother her up until Ben points out what a life with Susan means � this soon puts him off. Meanwhile, someone’s going on a double date, Janey’s sharing her fashion tips with Abi, even though she couldn’t care less and Michael enjoys being part of the cool crowd although he’s not enjoying the additional work. 53"What’s Up, Docklands?"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown2 April 2004 (2004-04-02)30 minutes7.24 millionBen and Susan flat-sit for their friends Geoff (Simon Kunz) and Stephanie (Caroline Loncq) in the London Docklands, whilst they go on holiday. They have problems with the technology, get lost while looking for the pizza man (Toby Sedgwick), set fire to the TV whilst smashing up the rest of the flat looking for the toilet. Ben then decides that they could swap all the broken stuff from their flat with the unsold flat downstairs but Susan disagrees. When the pizza finally arrives, Ben cannot unlock the door, so the pizza man pushes it through the letter box however it is cold, so Ben heats it up, but it catches fire and they have to throw it out of the window. They later ring up their friends and pretend that there has been a break in and that they got tied up to escape the blame. 54"Luck Be A Lady Tonight"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown16 April 2004 (2004-04-16)30 minutes7.63 millionRoger becomes depressed when Abi starts going out with a man called Steve (Ben Homewood), so Ben and Susan try and help Roger get a girlfriend so he can make Abi jealous. However, Roger ends up with an escort girl (Lucy Punch) who charges him two hundred pounds an hour. Meanwhile, Abi is being mistreated by her boyfriend as he is making her clean his house and clean out the drains. Also, Michael gets the house valued and starts to show people around much to his parents’ disbelief, whilst Roger reveals that he actually likes using escorts because there is absolutely no commitment, which suits him just fine. Ben and Susan soon realise that they must try and protect Roger. 55"First Past The Post"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown23 April 2004 (2004-04-23)30 minutes7.58 millionFollowing the death of their local councillor, Susan attempts to stand as an independent candidate in the by-election. She starts to work on the issues of street hygiene and speed bumps. She later suggests changes her middle name to the more statesman, like 'Barrington'. Meanwhile, Roger wins The Times crossword again, so Ben then tries to do the same thing but ends up massively disappointed until the name Harper finally appears in the winners column � the only thing is that Roger’s entered his crossword under the name Abi Harper. Also, Michael loses his pet tarantula called Nicola to everybody’s annoyance. 56"My Will Be Done"Dewi HumphreysAndrea Solomons30 April 2004 (2004-04-30)30 minutes6.05 millionFollowing the death of Susan's best friend Linda, she thinks about mortality. A website that she checks then gives Ben sixty-seven weeks to live, so he decides to write a will and makes Roger Michael's guardian if Ben dies. Also, Nick comes back from travelling on the Circle Line for six months, and gets a job as an Official Mourner at a local undertakers, which he loses when he steals a coffin, crashes three hearses and embalms his own leg. Meanwhile, Janey plans to be a rich woman and Abi becomes a rich woman when Ben reveals that he is going to leave everything to her when he dies. 57"My Fair Charlady"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida7 May 2004 (2004-05-07)30 minutes8.13 millionSusan gets fed up with doing all the housework, so she hires a super-efficient cleaner called Martha (Vicki Pepperdine). However, Susan soon feels redundant and much to Ben's annoyance, she says Martha has to go, which means that Ben has the job of firing her but when he finds out that Susan has been deliberately messing up the house he decides to keep her on. Meanwhile, Michael gets interested in football to impress a girl and Abi learns the dictionary, with Roger’s help, to get a job at the college library. Also, Ben hires Martha so that she can clean his surgery however when Susan finds out he is forced the sack her again, so Roger hires her. 58"The Mouth Trap"Dewi HumphreysAndrea Solomons14 May 2004 (2004-05-14)30 minutes6.53 millionMr. Addis (Gerard Horan), a patient of Ben's, confesses to murdering his wife (Suzanne Burden) while under sedation so Susan uses her new found interest in Inspector Morse to prove he committed the crime much to Ben’s dismay. Also, Michael claims his new girlfriend (Ulla van Zeller) is a supermodel, although nobody believes him. Meanwhile, Susan’s investigation gets out of hand when she ropes Abi in and breaks into Mr. Addis’s house. However, the pair are confronted by his wife who sits them down and eventually breaks conversation with them. She reveals that her husband has problems with crime dramas. She admits that he has been watching A Touch of Frost much to often. 59"While You Weren’t Sleeping"Dewi HumphreysDarin Henry21 May 2004 (2004-05-21)30 minutes7.40 millionBen's snoring starts to keep Susan awake so as first attempt at getting him to stop she sews tennis balls to the back of his top but Ben simply refuses to wear it, so they sleep in separate rooms, which puts the whole house under pressure. Meanwhile, Abi begins to think that she is the course of Ben and Susan’s unhappiness whilst a chat to with Ben seems to only confirm her worst fears. Also, Janey becomes a personal shopper for the other family members and changes Michael and Abi's wardrobes against their will. But something weird is about to conclude all the mayhem � Ben is about to display some happiness. 60"Dentist To The Stars"Dewi HumphreysJames Cary28 May 2004 (2004-05-28)30 minutes4.48 millionColin Judd (Peter Capaldi), a famous Hollywood actor, comes to Ben's surgery much to his delight. But before his second visit Ben hurts his back, and Roger gets all his famous patients including Jude Law and Kevin Spacey, and is invited to a special celebrity party to celebrate the film wrap which leaves Ben distraught. Meanwhile, when Susan is sacked as tour guide she reapplies to maintain her pride but finds that she has to revise first, and Michael is doing history coursework. Also, Ben struggles to get around the house when everybody leaves him alone in his paralysed state � all he wants is a glass of water � but has everyone actually left? 61"A Wife Less Ordinary"Dewi HumphreysSophie Hetherington4 June 2004 (2004-06-04)30 minutes4.98 millionWhen Susan gets bored with her predictable life, she finds herself life swapping with Janey for a week. With Susan living at Janey's flat and Janey moving into the Harper household trouble isn’t that distant. Ben then moves into his surgery and he and Susan recreate their first date, whilst Janey goes mad pretending she is a housewife with an imaginary husband much to Michael and Abi’s fear. Also, Abi brings her boyfriend, Michael,air max, around but he soon leaves after hearing some poisonous rumours about Abi from Michael. Meanwhile, Ben struggles to enjoy his people-free life style and soon wants to return home but does Susan? 62"The Book of Love"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida11 June 2004 (2004-06-11)30 minutes5.19 millionSusan joins a book club started by her neighbour, John Griffin (Paul Bradley), but when it turns out to consist of him and Susan, she begins to worry. Then he tries to seduce her, but she goes back a second time so she doesn't have to admit she was wrong, as Ben told her what Griffin would do. Meanwhile, Roger buys some very expensive Coldplay tickets from Michael to impress Abi but loses them and has to buy some more however Abi soon twigs what is happening and threatens Michael who then pretends to have found Roger’s lost tickets, and Janey becomes Ben's dental assistant and takes Kenzo (Thomas and Noah Davis) to work with her much to Ben’s annoyance. 63"Going Dental"Dewi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown18 June 2004 (2004-06-18)30 minutes5.62 millionWhen Susan refuses to go to Ben's dental conference at an expensive hotel because she is trying to write a novel, Janey goes instead. Everyone thinks Janey is Ben's mistress, and Ben goes along with this so he can get an important business partnership. Abi also goes to the conference to be with Roger, and Susan, Michael and Hubert soon end up there as well leading to a hectic few hours for Ben. The trouble then gets more intense as Janey reveals to Susan that Ben wanted her to pretend to be his mistress which leaves Susan in a foul mood. Also, Ben tries to get Abi to pretend to be his mistress but Roger isn’t going to let her. Guest starring Windsor Davies. [edit] Specials (2004-2005)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership64"Glad Tidings We Bring"Dewi HumphreysAndrea Solomons (story)Andrea Solomons, James Hendrie and Ian Brown (teleplay)24 December 2004 (2004-12-24)50 minutes8.91 millionJaney gets engaged to Ches Rochester (Danny Webb), a nightclub owner who is old enough to be her father, whom she has only known 10 days, but a psychic told her she would meet the love of her life at a wedding. They marry two weeks later at his house and Susan is worried about Ben giving the "father of the bride" speech. Meanwhile, Michael's girlfriend Molly (Verity Dearsley) is into long-term plans. At the wedding, Grace and Ches's father (Freddie Davies) dance together, while Michael and Hubert sell the wedding presents on eBay. But, shortly after marrying, Janey goes off with a waiter calls Lars (Mathew Bose) and asks for a divorce. Meanwhile, Nick is sending videos to Ben and Susan claiming to be destitute in the Far East and asks for money. Guest starring Edna Doré. X1"The Erroneous Storm"Demi HumphreysJames Hendrie and Ian Brown11 March 2005 (2005-03-11)5 minutes10.94 millionComic Relief Special: There is a thunderstorm going on, and after being scared Michael and Janey join Ben and Susan in their bedroom. They are soon joined by Nick who, thanks to now being a party reviewer, brings with him Adam Hart-Davis, Anthony Head, Myleene Klass, Nell McAndrew, Dermot Murnaghan, Clive Russell and Jamie Theakston. 65"...And I'll Cry If I Want To"Dewi HumphreysBrian Leveson and Paul Minett25 December 2005 (2005-12-25)50 minutes5.85 millionSusan is organising a third birthday for Kenzo (Tayler Marshall), partly to make up for the fact she got forgot Janey's third birthday, and wants Janey to bring the father. She wants to hire an expensive clown, but Ben secretly asks Roger to do it instead. However, on the day, Christmas Eve, Roger gets drunk so Ben has to do it instead. Meanwhile, Welsh musician Alfie Butts (Rhodri Meilir), a friend of Nick's, turns up and Susan insists he stay. Ben finds a ￡1200 ring which he thinks is for him from Susan, but is actually from Grace to her toyboy (John Burgess), so he goes out and buys Susan a ￡1200 first edition of Mrs Dalloway. Also, Michael gets a Christmas job as a postman and Abi becomes a beautician. [edit] Series Six (2006)Main article: My Family (series 6)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership66"Bliss For Idiots"Dewi HumphreysBrian Leveson and Paul Minett10 March 2006 (2006-03-10)30 minutes7.17 millionBen is unhappy with his patients, as they seem to be all lower class rough non-private money-grabbing peasants, but is even less happy with Susan's book-writing houseguest who is the complete opposite. Dr Buck, is the kind of person you would cross the street to avoid, in Ben’s eyes but to Susan he is nearing on a God - a God of self-help. However, when he comes to stay with them Ben soon begins to discover than perhaps Dr Buck’s calm tranquillity isn’t quite what it seems and Susan soon finds another side to him. Ben’s latest patient suggests that he joins his secret organisation as it may have the answer. Also, Roger speaks the Welsh to Abi and Alfie joins in. 67"The Spokes Person"Dewi HumphreysBrian Leveson, Paul Minett, Bert Tyler-Moore, George Jeffrie and Tess Morris17 March 2006 (2006-03-17)30 minutes7.42 millionBen starts a one-man anti-cycling campaign, which causes chaos in the household. He also appears on a radio show in an attempt to get people to support him however; all he manages to do is aggravate the whole cyclist population of London and have his house egged. Meanwhile, Susan makes a great effort towards her fund-raising idea by getting Michael to take photos of semi-naked men to form a calendar. Unfortunately she doesn’t check the pictures before sending them off to the printers. Also, Roger takes Abi to see Gordon Ramsey but to everybody else’s misfortune she has picked up some new cooking phrases. 68"Dentally Unstable"Dewi HumphreysAndrea Solomons31 March 2006 (2006-03-31)30 minutes6.41 millionWith Ben away on a two-week conference, Janey starts an affair with a replacement dentist whose charm captivates the rest of the females in the Harper household. When Susan attempts to put a stop to the new dentist and Janey he simply flatters her so she returns happy. Next its Grace’s turn but even she finds it hard to ignore his flattering one-liners. Even Abi is under to his spell to Roger’s disgust. Meanwhile, Michael's latest scam involves the aid of everyone, but will they help him out? Alfie’s reluctance to get involved causes Michael to threaten him with an ultimatum � either he takes part or he will tell ever one what he looks at on the internet. 69"Living The Dream"Dewi HumphreysTom Leopold7 April 2006 (2006-04-07)30 minutes6.28 millionBen and Susan join a pyramid selling scheme on Roger's advice even though he didn’t receive any of his money through the scheme. Upon asking Michael’s advice, he says don’t touch it but Ben and Susan know better, don’t they? Meanwhile, Roger buys himself some special treats and Ben finds himself getting extremely jealous as he cannot shift any of his stock. When Roger buys himself a convertible, Ben finds himself questioning Roger’s profits or rather, from whence they came. Also the family is suffering from the effects of a broken boiler, occasional power cuts and Ben’s dreams of having a champagne breakfast for the first time in his life. 70"An Embarrassment of Susans"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida14 April 2006 (2006-04-14)30 minutes6.10 millionBen buys the house next door to help with the family finances, but ends up involved in a "squatter's rights" dilemma but its alright. Perhaps he should just palm it off on Roger � that sounds fair, doesn’t it? However, when Susan finds out she demands that Ben should help Roger get his house back, so Ben, Roger and Alfie break in only to find out that it’s Style Squad, a television show. Meanwhile, Susan tries to fix Michael up with a new girlfriend called Suzanne, but the similarity is not limited to the name. However, Michael cannot see the similarity but Ben can and it appears to be scarring him ever so slightly. 71"And Other Animals"Dewi HumphreysTom Leopold21 April 2006 (2006-04-21)30 minutes6.17 millionWith Nick still away, Michael joining the Army, and Janey getting her stuff out of the attic, Susan is feeling deserted. Even Ben and Alfie don’t seem to be a comfort. However, a stray dog offers a little comfort but unfortunately it becomes man’s best friend however, perhaps it shouldn’t have chosen Ben as that man. Meanwhile, Michael attempts to hide his entire platoon in the attic, Ben attempts to get a priceless teddy bear back from the charity shop after donating it by accident and somebody is about to have a spout of bad luck and amazingly it isn’t Ben. Also, somebody’s looking for Michael, and all his comrades. 72"The Art of Being Susan"Dewi HumphreysBrian Leveson and Paul Minett28 April 2006 (2006-04-28)30 minutes6.22 millionWith Ben away again, a wealthy art collector called James Garrett invites Susan to dinner after her boss tells her to do anything to sell art. After contemplating taking him to Alton Towers, she decides to let him make the move with a little nudging. Meanwhile her mother, Grace, is gathering a collection of her own but only appears to be collecting men � however she misjudges how deaf one of them is and ends up with losing them all. Also, Roger is summoning up the courage to pop the question to Abi, it’s just a shame that she can’t she where is continuous stuttering is leading. When Roger finally does pop the question, Abi faints. [edit] Christmas Special (2006)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership73"The Heart of Christmas"Dewi HumphreysBrian Leveson and Paul Minett25 December 2006 (2006-12-25)50 minutes5.09 millionBen pretends to be ill to get out of Christmas, but when Susan insists he go to the doctor, they decide to run tests because of high blood pressure. Ben then enjoys his private room, but he is soon sent to a NHS ward, as it is soon discovered that his private health insurance has expired. The tests reveal that he needs an operation and during this he dreams that Susan is God. Meanwhile Abi, who is now engaged to Roger, wants a baby, Janey is having problems getting Kenzo's Christmas present and Alfie makes a special brew which he tells Michael will make them irresistible to women. Guest starring Roy Heather, Jeremy Child and Clive Russell. [edit] Series Seven (2007)Main article: My Family (series 7)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership74"The Ego Has Landed"Dewi HumphreysTom Anderson6 April 2007 (2007-04-06)30 minutes6.65 millionBen and Susan have dinner with Les and Clare Morton, who they met in Corfu, who ask Ben to be a sperm donor for them, something that increases Ben's ego. However, Dr. Kent Hawthorne (Jeremy Clyde) tells Ben that his sperm are "too lazy." Meanwhile, Janey is horrified when Kenzo's father, Mark Jameson, arrives and says that he now wants to be part of Kenzo's life. Janey is then upset when Kenzo calls Mark's wife, Linda, his "new Mummy", and she stops Mark from seeing Kenzo, until Susan persuades her otherwise. Abi has a dream that Roger cheated on her and later dreams that she has slept with Orlando Bloom. 75"Four Affairs and a Funeral"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida13 April 2007 (2007-04-13)30 minutes5.58 millionHenry (Eric Sykes), an elderly patient of Ben's, comes to the surgery for treatment and confesses that he is unhappy in his marriage; he feels that his wife, at the age of 42, might be a tad too old for him, so he has started an affair with a much younger woman. However, Henry soon dies in the surgery chair and leaves Ben in a very sticky situation � a situation that Roger isn’t too pleased about being roped into either. Soon, Ben finds himself comforting the wife of Henry but even sooner, he finds himself being dragged into the world of Henry’s other woman. Meanwhile, Susan is getting suspicious and follows Ben to the funeral much to his dismay. 76"Once More With Feeling"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida20 April 2007 (2007-04-20)30 minutes5.64 millionSusan suggests to Ben that they renew their wedding vows, but he is reluctant and when he is given director's tickets for a football match, they have to find a compromise that allows both to happen on the same day. Meanwhile, Janey is trying to getting Kenzo into St. Justin's School, and to do so has to impress the Vicar, Denis, who soon asks Janey out, but later goes off her after a conversation with Susan. However, he still agrees to recommend Kenzo for the school. Also, Abi and Roger decide to marry on a Saturday and Ben’s not-so-innocent chat with Kenzo leads to him grassing up Ben and consequently Susan stopping him from going to the football match. 77"Dutch Art and Dutch Courage"Dewi HumphreysSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida27 April 2007 (2007-04-27)30 minutes5.72 millionSusan is going away for the weekend with a millionaire James Garrett (Robert Bathurst) on an art-buying trip, which makes Ben jealous. At the hotel it is discovered that James's assistant forgot to book him a room, so he and Susan have to share a twin room. Meanwhile, Michael experiences his first failure when he fails his driving test. The following day Ben drives him to his university interview, and on the way buys Michael his first pint, which results in him throwing up all over the professor. Also, Janey hurts her neck at the gym and Alfie gives her an amazing massage which she then recommends to Abi resulting in a rather jealous Roger. 78"Susan of Troy"Dewi HumphreysEd Dyson4 May 2007 (2007-05-04)30 minutes6.48 millionSusan's mother Grace visits, and tells them she has got married on holiday to Brad. Soon after Ben, Susan, Michael, Janey, Alfie, Grace, Brad, Abi and Roger appear on a family edition of The Weakest Link, presented by Anne Robinson, after Michael applied to go on. Abi is voted off first, followed by Roger, Brad and Janey. Before Grace is voted off, she reveals on air that in 1973 a drunken Susan married a wrestler called Troy the Punisher in Las Vegas. Susan is then voted off, followed by a furious Ben, who demands to know what happened. Susan tells him the marriage was annulled after one day. In the head to head, Alfie beats Michael to win the ￡3000 prize money. 79"One of the Boys"Dewi HumphreysDavid Cantor11 May 2007 (2007-05-11)30 minutes6.76 millionBen's old University friend, Charlie Briggs (Diana Weston) arrives and when he arrives Ben faints as it is revealed Charlie has had a sex change and is now a woman. She asks Ben to give her away at her forthcoming wedding, but his initial reluctance sees Susan agree to give her away instead. Meanwhile, Roger's mother Nerys Bailey (Olwen Rees) arrives from Wales to meet Abi. She treats Roger like a child, and says that as a wedding present she is buying them a house next to hers in Wales. Susan has to force Roger to tell his mother he does not want to live next to her. Janey needs ￡10,000 so she can buy a share in a vintage clothing company, but the bank refuses her a loan. 80"Abi Ever After"Dewi HumphreysGeorge Jeffrie and Bert Tyler-Moore18 May 2007 (2007-05-18)30 minutes5.86 millionThe day before Roger and Abi's wedding, Ben and Susan hold a party. Abi's mother Shelley (Lorraine Chase), who has been married several times, tries to make a pass at Ben. Meanwhile, Michael and Alfie try to chat up a girl, and both tell her the other is gay. On the wedding day, Ben is best man and Janey is bridesmaid. It is also Janey's birthday, and her boyfriend Steve dumps her over the phone. When taking their vows, Abi says she cannot marry Roger, and tells Susan that she fears she will end up like her mother. However, Susan talks her round and Abi and Roger marry. 81"Breaking Up Ain’t Hard To Do"Dewi HumphreysBrian Leveson and Paul Minett25 May 2007 (2007-05-25)30 minutes5.57 millionBen and Susan's oldest friends, Ted and Joanna Draper (Geoffrey McGivern and Emma Amos), are having marriage problems and Ben and Susan soon get involved. They then argue themselves about what in the house belongs to who. Meanwhile, Janey wants Kenzo to appear in a television advert for breakfast cereal, but pulls him out just before the audition as she begins to feel guilty that she isn’t giving Kenzo a choice and is then offered a part herself. Michael tries unsuccessfully to make Alfie a Internet musical star but due to Alfie’s stage fright, even though the only other person in the room is Michael, prevents his debut. 82"Life Begins At Fifty"Dewi HumphreysGeorge Jeffrie and Bert Tyler-Moore8 June 2007 (2007-06-08)30 minutes4.84 millionSusan is arrested for stealing a pair of ￡250 sunglasses, at the same as she is going through the menopause. However, she refuses to accept that this has caused her to forget to pay for them. When the case goes to court Ben defends her and tries to persuade the Court that the stealing was a result of the menopause. The Judge (Nichola McAuliffe) dismisses the case and gives Susan advice on the menopause much to Susan’s disgust. Meanwhile, Alfie takes Kenzo to the park for Janey and meets a girl called Melanie, and later pretends Kenzo is his son and Janey his ex-wife � but can he convince Janey to play along? [edit] Christmas Special (2007)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership83"Ho Ho No"Baz TaylorTom Anderson26 December 2007 (2007-12-26)60 minutes6.14 millionSusan tells Ben that she has planned his perfect Christmas, a quiet stay at a country hotel without the children. However, she has secretly invited the whole family, and Alfie turns up with his strange uncle and Michael brings his Communist girlfriend Gwen Amy Noble. Susan tries to ensure that Ben does not see the rest of the family, which proves difficult when Abi, who has become the hotel's massage therapist, has to give him a massage. Later that evening, Crystal, one of Ben's patient's who is stalking him, turns up saying her fiancee has just escaped from prison and is coming to kill Ben, and a mysterious man (John Challis) who says he is an actor playing Jacob Marley turns up. Susan and Ben then run round the hotel trying to hide from the fiancee, and soon Ben sees that the whole family is there. Gwen's father then turns up. Later, when Ben goes to Reception, the Police tell him that Crystal's fiancee has been caught. When he and the rest of the family go back into the main hall it has been mysteriously decorated and Christmas presents placed on the floor. [edit] Series Eight (2008)Main article: My Family (series 8)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership84"The Parent Trap"Baz TaylorBrian Leveson and Paul Minett11 April 2008 (2008-04-11)30 minutes5.56 millionBen is delighted when he takes delivery of a plasma television for his neighbour Mr. MacIntyre, who is on holiday. Michael tells his parents that Nikki (Ellie Beaven), his girlfriend, is pregnant. He wants to propose to her, but her deeply religious parents, the Bakers, dislike the idea but suggest they donate ￡20,000 for the child's upbringing. When Nikki's parents throw her out, she moves in with Michael. Shortly after they arrive to talk to Nikki, and the Harpers leave them alone in the lounge. After hearing nothing, they check on them to discover that the Bakers have stolen nearly everything. Also, Janey is dating widowed Daniel and is determined that Kenzo and Daniel's son Joshua should get on. 85"Let’s Not Be Heisty"Baz TaylorEd Dyson18 April 2008 (2008-04-18)30 minutes5.43 millionWhen Ben goes to his bank to pay in a cheque from Alfie for two years' rent, he walks in during a robbery. Minutes later Janey follows him in. The robbers are a bickering couple Joan (Pauline Quirke) and Gary (Perry Benson), while the other hostages are Jim McKenzie (Sean Scanlan), manager Peter Warwick (Simon Chandler) and chief cashier Belinda Smith (Emma Kennedy). Janey is soon released in return for food, and hours later the police storm the bank and the other hostages are released. With Susan away, during the robbery a young, blonde Family Liaison Officer Penny Bishop (Georgia Moffett) comes round to comfort Michael and he takes advantage of the situation. 86"Cards on the Table"Baz TaylorBrian Leveson and Paul Minett25 April 2008 (2008-04-25)30 minutes5.23 millionBen becomes addicted to poker while Susan has become addicted to seeing clairvoyant Zelda Nobbs (Anna Chancellor). Zelda tells Susan that Ben will die the following Thursday at 9.04 pm. When her other predictions come true, Ben and Susan plan to spend his final moments having sex. Just as they are about to, they realise their lounge clock has stopped and it is already 9.30 pm. To celebrate him not dying, they decide to go to Venice. Meanwhile, Susan suggests Roger gets some friends after he is annoyed that Abi goes out with her friends. Roger then goes out for the night with Michael and his friends, and plays poker with Ben's poker circle. 87"The Wax Job"Baz TaylorSteve Armogida and Jim Armogida2 May 2008 (2008-05-02)30 minutes5.13 millionSusan is made the manager of the art gallery, and immediately has to prepare for a new exhibition. Meanwhile, Ben retires when he sells out to the Cavatex Corporation, which has become Roger's employer. Ben then starts painting model military figures and uses Alfie's room as a hobby room. Alfie then moves into Michael's room, and Janey soon has to give them relationship advice so they get on better. Ben soon gets bored of his new hobby, and assists Susan to set up the exhibition. When he gets the money for the surgery, and it is less than he expected, Ben has to go to Cavatex and persuade them he is committed to Cavatex so he gets his job back. 88"Neighbour Wars"Baz TaylorDarin Henry9 May 2008 (2008-05-09)30 minutes5.02 millionBen accidentally drives into Mr. Casey (Nickolas Grace), the neighbour whose dog he previously ran over, and he ends up in hospital. The Police decide to take no action, but Ben wants Mr. Casey to sign a disclaimer so he cannot later be sued. Mr. Casey then spends his time recovering in Ben's house with Ben trying to persuade him to sign the disclaimer. However, Mr. Channing (Jonathan Aris), from the insurance company tells Ben he believes it is a scam and Ben then tries to catch Mr. Casey out. However, in the process he sits fire to his bedroom and they then have to make a deal so both can claim insurance. Meanwhile, Susan and Kenzo are in Scarborough for a week with Grace. 89"Can’t Get No Satisfaction"Nic PhillipsDavid Cantor16 May 2008 (2008-05-16)30 minutes4.89 millionKenzo is learning the piano, much to the family's disappointment. Ben reforms the rock and roll band he was with in his 20s, The Revolutions, and makes contact with guitarists Ziggy (Philip Bird) and Danny (David Keyes) and drummer Sticks (Rowland Rivron). However, they soon want to sack him as the lead singer. Susan hasn't the heart to tell him, until Ben criticises Kenzo during a school piano recital. Meanwhile, Michael organises dates for himself and Alfie over the Internet, but get their photographs mixed up and they have to pretend they are each other on the double date with Terri (Manal El-Feitury) and Georgia (Louise Mardenborough). 90"The Abi Habit"Nic PhillipsTom Anderson23 May 2008 (2008-05-23)30 minutes4.74 millionHaving not had sex for several weeks, Susan decides that to spice up their sex lives they should abstain from sex and even the slightest physical contact for three weeks. Ben is annoyed with this, but Susan is determined. Meanwhile, Roger gets a note from Abi that says she has left him to become a nun. Ben and Susan drive him to Abi's convent and she and Roger talk, but he is unable to persuade her to leave the convent and they leave without her. Janey asks Michael to look into her latest boyfriend, Ron (Ben Jones), and discovers that he still lives with his mother, something Janey says does not concern her. [edit] Christmas Special (2008)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership91"Have An Unhappy Christmas"Nic PhillipsBrian Leveson and Paul Minett24 December 2008 (2008-12-24)60 minutes7.12 millionBen buys Susan a vacuum cleaner but soon regrets it, so he goes out to buy a necklace but is horrified to find it half price in a sale the next day. He goes back to complain but ends up getting locked in. Meanwhile Janey, Michael and Alfie order a stack of household items (mugs, plates, keyrings etc.) with Ben and Susan's wedding photo on them. However a factory error leads to a risqué photo from Ben and Susan's wedding night being printed on the items. Guest starring Julian Clary. [edit] Series Nine (2009)Main article: My Family (series 9)#TitleDirected byWritten byOriginal airdateDurationViewership92"Bully For Ben"Nic PhillipsBrian Leveson and Paul Minett2 April 2009 (2009-04-02)30 minutes6.72 millionIt's Ben and Susan's wedding anniversary and Ben is trying to write a loving message in a card but is having serious difficulties, despite fierce prompting from daughter Janey. Janey sets off for the local pub quiz with her brother, Michael, lodger Alfie and Ben's annoying work colleague, Roger. Ben is insulted that he wasn't invited but decides to tag along anyway. As their team falls behind in the quiz, Alfie points out that a player on another team has been cheating by texting all night. Ben decides to confront the phone cheat, Barry, who invites him outside to settle their disagreement. Ben backs out of the fight but is determined to get into shape so he can return to confront Barry. 93"Bringing Up Janey"Nic PhillipsAmy Shindler9 April 2009 (2009-04-09)30 minutes4.93 millionSusan is all dressed up for a working lunch with James Garrett. Ben is more than a little jealous, despite Susan's assurances that it's purely a professional relationship



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